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Timeless military advice


Hollowpoint

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"Aim Towards the Enemy"

-instructions printed on US Rocket launcher

"When the pin is pulled, Mr Grenade is not our friend"

- US Army

"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate.

the bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground"

- U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop

"If the enemy is in range, so are you"

-Infantry Journal

"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."

-Army's magazine of preventive maintenance.

"It is generally unadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed"

- U. S. Air Force Manual

"Try to look unimportant, they may be out of ammo"

-Infantry Journal

"Tracers work both ways"

- U.S. Army Ordnance

"Five second fuses only last three seconds"

- Infantry Journal

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid"

-Col. David Hackworth

"If your attack is going too well, you're probably walking into an ambush"

Infantry Journal

"No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection"

- Joe Gay

"Any ship can be a minesweeper,,,once."

- Anon.

"Never tell the platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do."

-Unknown Army recruit

Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."

-Your Buddies

'If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."

- U.S.A Ammo Troop

:mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

GRUß

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Also gut. Du übersetzt das dann auf Russisch und Thüringisch! :wink: :mrgreen:

STETS AKTUELLE MILITÄRISCHE RATSCHLÄGE

"Zielen Sie auf den Feind" - Bedienungsanleitung auf einem US-Raketenwerfer

Wenn der Sicherungsstift gezogen wurde ist Mister Granate nicht [mehr] unser Freund

Flächenbombardements [per Submunitionsverteiler] mit B-52-Bombern sind sehr sehr zielgenau. Die Bomben schlagen garantiert immer auf dem Boden ein.

Wenn der Feind in Schussweite ist, bist DU es auch.

Ein loses Tragegestell könnte Ihren M203 Granatwerfer abfeuern, wenn Sie es am wenigsten erwarten. Das würde Sie bei den Überresten Ihrer Einheit ziemlich unbeliebt machen.

Es ist im Allgemeinen nicht ratsam, über dem Zielgebiet, das Sie gerade bombardierten den Schleudersitz zu betätigen.

Versuchen Sie unwichtig auszusehen, Ihren Feinden könnte die Munition ausgegangen sein.

Leuchtspurgeschosse sind ein zweischneidiges Schwert.

Zeitzünder mit fünfsekündiger Zündverzögerung detonieren bereits nach drei Sekunden.

Tapferkeit bedeutet, dass nur DU weißt, dass du Angst hast.

Wenn ein Angriff zu erfolgreich ist, läufst Du vielleicht in eine Hinterhalt.

Keine kampfbereite Einheit hat jemals eine Truppeninspektion bestanden.

Jedes Schiff kann man als Minensuchboot einsetzen. Zumindest einmal.

Sage NIEMALS Deinem Zugführer dass Du nichts zu tun hast.

Lenke niemals das Feuer auf Dich. Es wirkt auf die Leute um Dich herum störend. - Deine Kameraden.

Wenn Sie einen Bombentechniker rennen sehen, versuchen sie mit ihm Schritt zu halten.

GRUß

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...dann noch ein paar von den Weisheiten :)

Murphy's Law on Combat:

- Incoming fire has right of way.

- If it's stupid and it works, it ain't stupid.

- When in doubt ----- empty your magazine.

- The easy way is always mined.

- Teamwork is essential ----- it gives them somebody else to shoot at.

- Anything you do can get you shot, including doing nothing.

- Never share a weapon pit with someone braver then you.

- If your attack is going really well it's an ambush.

- No battle plan survives contact with the enemy.

- Your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.

- The only thing more accurate then enemy incoming fire is friendly incoming fire.

- When you have secured the area don't forget to tell the enemy.

- Make it tough enough for the enemy to get in and you wont be able to get out.

- If your short on anything but the enemy ----- your in a combat zone.

- The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions ----- when your ready and when your not.

- A sucking chest wound is natures way of telling you to slow down.

- Friendly fire - isn't.

- Recoilless rifles - aren't.

- Suppressive fires - won't.

- You are not Superman.

- If at first you don't succeed, call in an airstrike.

- If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.

- Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.

- The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.

- There is no such thing as a perfect plan.

- Five second fuzes always burn three seconds.

- There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.

- A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.

- The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.

- Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire. For this reason, it is not at all uncommon for aircraft carriers to be known as bomb magnets.

- No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.

- No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.

- Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.

- Things that must work together, can't be carried to the field that way.

- Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support.

- Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially during both.

- If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.

- When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right.

- Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.

- Military Intelligence is a contradiction.

- Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.

- Weather ain't neutral.

- If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed towards you.

- Air defense motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em out on the ground.

- 'Flies high, it dies; low and slow, it'll go.

- The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.

- Napalm is an area support weapon.

- Mines are equal opportunity weapons.

- B-52s are the ultimate close support weapon.

- Sniper's motto: reach out and touch someone.

- Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.

- The one item you need is always in short supply.

- Interchangeable parts aren't.

- It's not the one with your name on it; it's the one addressed "to whom it may concern" you've got to think about.

- The side with the simplest uniforms wins.

- Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps.

- If the Platoon Sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.

- Never stand when you can sit, never sit when you can lie down, never stay awake when you can sleep.

- The most dangerous thing in the world is a Second Lieutenant with a map and a compass.

- Exceptions prove the rule, and destroy the battle plan.

- Everything always works in your HQ, everything always fails in the Colonel's HQ.

- The enemy never watches until you make a mistake.

- One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is entirely too many.

- A clean (and dry) set of BDU's is a magnet for mud and rain.

- The worse the weather, the more you are required to be out in it.

- Whenever you have plenty of ammo, you never miss. Whenever you are low on ammo, you can't hit the broad side of a barn.

- The more a weapon costs, the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.

- The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.

- Field experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

- No matter which way you have to march, its always uphill.

- If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove anything.

- For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism. (in boot camp)

- Airstrikes always overshoot the target, artillery always falls short.

- When reviewing the radio frequencies that you just wrote down, the most important ones are always illegible.

- Those who hesitate under fire usually do not end up KIA or WIA.

- The tough part about being an officer is that the troops don't know what they want, but they know for certain what they don't want.

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  • 3 years later...

Bohlen ausgeraubt

Schwerer Schock für Musik-Produzent Dieter Bohlen (52): Am Montagmorgen gegen 8.45 Uhr drangen zwei Räuber in seine Villa in Tötensen (bei Hamburg) ein ? Überfall!

Mit vorgehaltener Pistole und einem Küchenmesser zwangen zwei Unbekannte den 65jährigen Gärtner, an Bohlens Haustür zu klopfen.

Ahnungslos öffnete die Haushälterin den Verbrechern. Der Gärtner wurde brutal ins Haus gestoßen, gemeinsam mit der Haushälterin in der Küche gefesselt.

Dann kamen Dieter Bohlen und seine Freundin in die Küche, wurden ebenfalls bedroht und gefesselt!

Die Täter trugen Strick-Masken, sprachen mit leichtem ausländischen Akzent und forderten Bohlen zur Herausgabe von Wertsachen auf.

Die Überwachungskamera filmte den Überfall! Die Polizei veröffentlichte einige der Bilder.

Nach dem Raub konnten die Maskenmänner mit der Beute unerkannt zu Fuß flüchten. Bohlen, seine Freundin und die beiden Angestellten befreiten sich nach 20 Minuten selbst, alarmierten die Polizei.

Die Beamten lösten eine Großfahndung aus, riegelte die Zufahrtsstraßen ab und durchsuchten das Gelände um das Anwesen mit einer Hundestaffel.

Bohlens erste Täterbeschreibung: Es soll sich um junge Männer handeln, beide ca. 1,70 - 1,80 m groß, schlank. Einer trug laut Polizei eine schwarze Jacke, der andere eine graue Winterjacke und einen schwarzen Rucksack.

Angeblich erbeuteten die Räuber Geld aus dem Tresor. Nach Polizeiangaben wurde niemand verletzt.

Polizeisprecher Matthias Rose: ?Bohlen war zunächst sehr aufgeregt, hat sich aber schnell wieder gefangen.?

Quelle = bild.de

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